After they left, a very drunk girl rolled up on a Yellow Bike. I'm going to call her L, and she was actually camped not far away. She parked the bike and took off for the potties, which were apparently right across from her camp. L had a megaphone when she left for the potties, but not when she returned. She didn’t know where she left it. She volunteered at the Commissary, and that was her only day off. She started off on a rant against children at Burning Man. “I f***ing hate kids. Why do people do that? F***ing crotch maggots.” People who talk like that have no idea how insulting it is to folks who have kids and work hard their whole lives to be good parents. Like me. It makes people who work hard to be good parents not want to be friends with them. She was camped near Kidsville (where some people go to bed when they should). She kept getting sleepier; I suggested she go back to her camp for a nap, or just relax in one of the comfortable folding chairs, but she just wanted to keep drinking.
Just then, Sunburn Sarah needed help putting up a carport. As we finished, Sarah cried out-- It was Jenn! She gave everybody a big hug, and then we talked for a bit. She got in very late Sunday night, and after 12 hours on the road they just crashed. Her dad was very sick, and she was very worried about him. Jenn was serving fruit at her camp for Burners Against Scurvy. It was very good to see her again. In the bar, L was passed out in an uncomfortable chair. “Another satisfied customer.” Down the road, somebody set off a big firecracker. It woke up a bunch of folks in the camp. I brought a bunch of stuff for the bar, including cups, shot glasses and bloody Mary mix. A blonde girl named Jackie walked thrugh with her boyfriend. They said they’d come back “at a more reasonable hour.”
My first Ranger shift started at noon. I cleaned my feet and put on
moisturizer and got ready… but just as I was about to leave, that’s when
the big MASH tent went up. It took about a dozen of us to push it up in
the wind and get it ratcheted down. In the bar, L was still passed out,
but in a different part of the ground. It was like she was moving along
by continental drift. By the time the MASH tent was up, it was 11:45 and
I rushed over to HQ. Ranger Stonebeard said I was “early for being late.”
Coco gave me a hug, and Shutterbug said hi. I brought pocket journals to
give away as gifts, and the Rangers that took them were very appreciative.
I checked in and got my radio.
|I got teamed up with Ranger Limoncello (“lemon jello”) from Portland. We got assigned 2 to 3 o’clock, from Esplanade to L Street. It was bright out, but not that hot. Yet. We helped direct a guy to the DPW. Limoncello had an application on his smartphone that mapped every camp in Black Rock City, and even showed our current location. We stopped to talk to a guy with a huge VW bus and Beetle. They were much larger than normal, but proportionate. He said it was like driving a truck.|
|Heading back towards the outer ring of the city, we stopped at the
Orgasmic Veggie bar. They were offering fresh vegetables. I snuck a cherry
tomato. That’s where we met Matt, Mark and a pretty girlfriend named Eunice.
On the outer road, we met up with a nice couple offering cold water. Her name was Sparkle, but he didn’t have a “playa name” yet. I said his name was to be determined, and he decided that would be his name from now on: To Be Determined, TBD. Camps on the outer ring were very sparse. Way out on L, we ran into somebody who was looking for a camp at 2:15 and Rod’s Road. Rod’s Road was the outer ring road around Center Camp, so he was way off… but that’s where somebody at Playa Info, which was next to Center Camp, told him to go. “You mean it was right near Playa Info?!?” he said. After the guy took off, Limoncello wondered if anybody could sit down at Playa Info and just “make stuff up.”
|On the Esplanade, we stopped to look at some faux Babylonian statues,
made of paper mache, or maybe plaster. That’s where we talked to a guy
called Go, from Boston. It was his first year.
Limoncello and I went down a side street and stopped at the Voodoo Camp, where they had a blowgun shooting gallery. I talked to a pretty redhead (Tina?) from Portland. We kept running into people from Portland.
|There was a big, empty section of land marked off with oversized toadstools.
We got assigned out to the Man (‘the Stick”) so we walked on out. We met up with the main Man Watchers, Ms. Bunny and Electra. It was much cooler once we were in the shade of the Man. The whole thing was an amazing construction. A lady was walking around playing with a life-sized marionette of a Victorian lady, having a fun time talking with people. I met a glittery girl from New York. Scoutmaster stopped by to check out the Man.